Paradigm + nickel = two bit cartoon flap

BILLINGSGATE JOURNAL (Dateline San Diego)

CARTOON BULLETIN: For those of you who have grown tired of watching unemployed camelians burning Danish embassies for breakfast and Kentucky Fried Chicken outlets for lunch, the tide will turn. Fear not my feckless friends. The BILLINGSGATE JOURNAL will not be on the menu for their evening meal. Precautions have been taken, especially in Pakistan and Syria, to confuse these latter-day despots from burning down my bureaus there. I have sprayed my offices with curdled lion urine so that when their camels get close enough to smell the scent, they will turn tail and run. Doctor 1: Rioters 0.

Cartoons of Mohammed, in my opinion, have not gone far enough. Putting a bomb in Muhammed's bonnet merely reminds one that those who advocate violence in their Prophet's name have already desecrated him. Just because it's not a pictorial doesn't make these camelians less responsible. Also, as far as I know, none of the offending cartoonists has been subsidized by the Danish National Endowment of the Arts. In the United States, Piss Christ, the notorious photo depicting a small plastic crucifix submerged in a glass of the artist's urine was supported and funded by our own National Endowment for the Arts (your tax money). Outraged Christians of all denominations demanded their money back and burnt their toast as a sign of unity. Christians 1: Muslims 0.

PARADIGMATIC CARTOONISH CONCLUSION: The real story is why The New York Times, the grey lady, did not publish these cartoons. They hid behind their doors, not willing to tell the story by using the offending cartoons as evidence to help their readers to decide if they were indeed, offensive. They chose to pretend that they didn't fear Islam retaliation on their foreign bureaus. They let other newspapers take the chance, including this JOURNAL. BILLINGSGATE JOURNAL 1: New York Times 0.