G-8 Doubles Aid to Africa

BILLINGSGATE JOURNAL (Dateline San Diego)

BULLETIN: One day after Al Quada bombs the shit out of London, the next morning headlines are: G- 8 Doubles Aid to Africa! President George "The Great Healer" Bush tells the Britains to remain steadfast and strong, admiring their solidarity and strength of character. The Queen, in her best pork pie hat, mumbles something about them not changing our way of life. (I presume that she is referring to the Gays who missed their bus on the way to the bath house).

Not one f..cking interview with an outraged, bleeding Brit who has had enough of those demented ragheads and wants to kick some Muslim ass! Instead, they put the camera on a pierced nose prevert crying in the street because his air start was interrupted by the bombing. What the Hell is going on? Unless Al Qaeda blows up at least 1000 innocent men, women and children, they can't even keep the headlines for more than one day. I guess the message is that they have to go nuclear to get some attention. And they just might do that.

With the President promising more aid to Africa, Congress worrying about who will be nominated for the Supreme Court, Greta trying to find Natalie in Aruba, water temperatures rising in the Atlantic Ocean and a hurricane kicking ass in Florida, can you guess what the LALA Times was headlining this morning? "Muslim clerics in London worried about possible bad feelings generated by bombings." You figure it out, I can't.

Why doesn't someone want to kick some ass? Are we so afraid of offending someone that we resort to shaking down 80 year old grandmas so that we can't be accused of profiling 30 year old ragheads? Give me a break! We are becoming so feminized that even the broads are wearing dresses because they are ashamed to be mistaken for men.

DR. BILLINGSGATE will not be taking house call this evening. He will be at the Beachcomber readying himself for tomorrow's golf tournament.