Going to the mattresses

BILLINGSGATE JOURNAL (Dateline San Diego)

BULLETIN: Muster the goombahs and hit the mattresses! In the movie, "The Godfather" Michael Corleone went to the mattresses when trying to eradicate his enemies. His pathetic band of sociopathic goombahs gathered together in a rummy apartment, threw down moldy mattresses for bedding, put on a pot of spaghetti and lived like Sicilians for a couple of weeks, not leaving until they ran out of meatballs.

"Yo! BILLINGSGATE. What's a matter with you"!
"Nothing. What's a matter with you"?
"Nothing. What's a matter with you"?
"Meatsa ballsa!"
"Yo! BILLINGSGATE.....betrayal..."

Yes, I'm getting a little paranoid. Seems like we may have to go to the mattresses. Stinkin liberals are closing in on me. Trying to shut me down. An institution in America being treated like yesterday's fishwrap by these latter day commies. Apparently my nomination for the Bulshitzer Prize has been canned because of political correctness. Now my journals will be just another postscript to the illusory history of neo-con values, part of the flotsam bobbing behind the dam of pinko obstructionism, condemned, eviserated and banned from receiving a just evaluation from the Bulshitzer Board.

To my neo-con readers, I enjoin you to hit the mattresses and hit 'em hard. We need to wipe these pukes out. I promise clean mattresses and meatsa-ballsa until we get 'em all.

Cordially, BILLINGSGATE