Ask Dr. BILLINGSGATE

BILLINGSGATE JOURNAL (Dateline San Diego)

Dear Dr. BILLINGSGATE,

Thank you for making the appropriate grammatical correction regarding the Lewinsky ruling. I hope that the new Chief Justice will not attempt to correct this ruling once he joins the Supreme Court. She be no ho. And that's that.....Ruth Bader Ginsburg

Dear Ruthie Babe,

Judge Roberts said that he would be an umpire, not a player. The first thing I want him to do when he takes charge of the court is to make you wear a burka and then throw you out of the game so no one has to look at your sad sack again. Go back to the ACLU, you commie pinko!

Dear Dr. BILLINGSGATE,

Did you find any fruits, nuts and vegetables when you made your pilgrimage back to Nebraska?..........Big Red from Pilger, Nebraska

Dear Big Red,

I found the fruits sweet, the nuts hard and the vegetables edible. And that was just the hors d'oeuvres. The entre was even better. But thanks for asking, you old horned toad. I must have missed you at the Green Onion.

Once again, the Doctor has revealed the truth as only he knows it. Go Big Red!