BILLINGSGATE'S credentials questioned

BILLINGSGATE JOURNAL (Dateline San Diego)

BULLETIN: Are readers naive enough to think it a coincidence that on the same weekend that one of the greatest natural disasters of history devastated parts of the world, the San Diego Chargers were defeated by the Colts and BILLINGSGATE'S credentials were openly questioned by liberal pundits? Make no mistake. There is a linkage that connects all of these events. The very improbability of even one of these catastrophies happening in a given year is probably 50-1. For all to happen on a single weekend is beyond all odds and begs the question: Was there a superlunar force involved? Something beyond the moon?

As you know, BILLINGSGATE has seldom ventured far from the paved highway of social pragmatism. Although it might be said that I often go beyond parallel in my backswing, so does John Daly. But the oohs and aahs that we generate respectively from the sweet contact of club to ball and in my case, the sweet smack of repartee to the pink butts of the liberals is worth all the criticism.

BILLINGSGATE regrets not having the perfect foil to badger every day. The chicken lipped, slack jawed jackal from Massachusetts, who by the way, served in Vietnam, offered an easy and accessable target for the conservative literati, as did the New York Times and CBS. Will BILLINGSGATE be able to keep up the frenetic pace set before the election. Probably not. But do expect a more spiritual, a more loving BILLINGSGATE in the future.